Notes On A Moviegoing

It's been a while since I've been to the movies... hence a dearth of film reviews.  Partly it's personal - with everything going on around me, there hasn't been time, or the urge to  escape quite that way.  Also, September on the film calendar has, over the past few years, gotten remarkably worst.  Just as January has become "clunker" time, September seems to be joining it on the calendar as a pure dumping ground.  Academy Award rules require at least a week's run in either New York or LA to qualify - hence the reason that big serious flicks tend to open at Christmas - which means that late disasters can get pushed into January as a stopgap.  That used to be less true of September, but now studios seem to seriously consider September the place to put summer disasters, as well as curiosity pictures that can't get dropped like bombs on January, but still will likely tank.

October is turning out to be a boom month though, and I was caught napping.  My plan to review The Jane Austen Book Club kind of went awry, and now I have two films in two days to add to the list - Michael Clayton and Lust/Caution (both raves, by the way, should I write them). I was planning to start tonight, but it's late and I'm tired.

So, in lieu of that, some thoughts on that thing I do - going to the movies.

I don't write much about the movie going experience.  I love what's on the screen, not the theater, generally, so I don't see the need some do to think deeply about chairs, lines, or refreshments. A nice seat, a bag of popcorn and a good film, and even the dankest horror will probably do (and believe me, I've sat in some pretty lame dumps).  But I have some passing knowledge given my years of experience, so perhaps it's unfair not to share.  Herewith, some thoughts on the theater going experience.  Your anecdotes and experiences welcome, as always.

• Go early.  Oh how I tire of people who complain that they can't find good seats.  Usually this comes from the perennially late, who can't be bothered to show up more than 5 minutes before (and often five minutes after) the lights go down.  I aim for 30-45 minutes ahead myself.  Seems dull? Bring a book (or as my Mom does, the Times crossword).  Yes, some theaters can be a little dim, but many are lit enough.  And if you go with a friend, those moments in an empty theater make great catch-up time.
• Don't go on Friday or Saturday night (unless you are willing to put up with idiocy). Yes, it's fun to be first.  But lately, the joy gas so been drained out of opening night, it's hard to see why bother; chances are, in this internet the really in the know people have already seen it, and the reviews got posted a week ago. Seriously, if you're dying to be an "in the know" type then do what we do - go on Friday afternoon or early Saturday (late Saturday afternoon can often be as annoying as Saturday night, though).  Only the true megahits will draw a crowd at noon on Friday (Hairspray was surprisingly full first show).  Conversely, try the Thursday Midnight show of some blockbusters; it can be crowded and a little crazy, but you're guaranteed an audience of enthusiastic die-hards, which can enhance the experience.
• Line waiting.  Look, lines are inevitable (especially, again on Friday and Saturday nights).  If you hate them, then work to avoid them.  But otherwise, arrive early, and bring a friend.  Friends can help with getting the good spot (especially if you are just constitutionally incapable of being the early one) ib kine, and one of you can get the popcorn.  But above all, respect the line and the line dynamics.  Nobody likes a cutter, and many people don't like the 8 seat savers. Four per holdee is reasonable.  Over that, there better be more than one of you, and more than one coat.
• Refreshments.  I'm old fashioned I admit - popcorn and a soda are my movie meal staples.  And maybe a hot dog.  I am viscerally opposed to nachos, but I admit they make a reasonable choice for some.  What's out? Complete meals, pizzas, curly fries,... and anything that's blue (yes, I mean slushies, first and foremost)... just cause they sell it doesn't make you an idiot for ordering it.  And a word about ordering - know what you want and get your money out.  Especially if there's a line.  And don't ask to see what the "medium" size looks like.  It just makes you look dumb. If you're that concerned about whether the portion size will make you fat, just get out of line.  Ice cream? the jury is still out, but remember, melting is a drawback. Oh, and just my sense of things - a theater that serves beer will attract the wrong crowd. Oh and a theater that serves lattes is pretentious.  All the better to order popcorn and crunch it. Right, Jennifer?
• Previews - look, I want to see what's coming, and I want a lot of them.  And I don't mind an attractive commercial for Levi's Jeans, either.  If you don't like that stuff, come late, and take your chances (and I promise you disappointment).  Or stay home (and I promise you life as a couch potato, which will make you unfortunate).  But please, just stop complaining.  You are tiring.
• Bathrooms.  I never say this usually - but I wouldn't do a #2 in a movie theater bathroom... if you get my drift.  I used to be an usher.  Trust me, those places are just ahead of the bus station - and thats after some teenager cleans it.

Now some favorite theaters:

• First the stand alones: The Ziegfeld and The Paris in New York, The Senator in Baltimore. Old movie palaces are the best.
• Second the art houses: Kendall Square in Cambrdge, Film Forum in New York, the new Landmark theater in the East Village.  Lincoln Plaza, which is classy without being stuffy. The Jacob Burns Film Center in Westchester which is pretentious, but comfy. Ones I can't stand:  The Quad n New York - like seeing them in your friend's rec room... but great selection.  The Angelika on Houston - like seeing them in your Dad's basement... and the selection is lame.  The Charles in Baltimore, which is pretentious and has no right to be.
• Third, the googleplexes: Boston Common Cinema 19 in Boston - surprisingly diverse selection, not as hellacious as one might expect even with crowds; The AMC 25 in New York, which logically shouldn't work (escalators???) but does; The Chelsea Cinemas in Chelsea, which knows its Gay audience; the Loews/AMC on 2nd Ave at 32nd - also well laid out, and a good audience In Baltimore, the cinemas out by Owings Mills and the new monsterplex at Hunt Valley are good for the modern age.  In Westchester, I'm still partial to the Saw Mill Multiplex by my Mom - not perfect, but always reliable, and there's a great Chinese place that's fast across the street.  Ones I hate? The Sony Lincoln Center Cinemas at 68th - but it's an Upper West Side crowd thing as much as the space.  the Fenway multiplex - I want to like it... but it's poorly laid out. The 34th Street West Side Loews - horrible crowd, horrible staff, poorly laid out, and always crowded and icky.

Comments

[jinbaltimore]

been so long since I've been thanks for reminding me of the reason for that...sounds rather like getting through a day at the DMV