This time I am going to jump in over RedStar, because this is personal: the stunning decision in California to allow same sex marriages has left me floored.
Indeed, when I first heard it on the car radio this afternoon, I didn't entirely comprehend the enormity of it: we now have two states where gays and lesbians will be able to get marriage licenses (and, more cynically... divorces).
For a long time I was very ambivalent about gay marriage; I am old school in my rad fag tendencies, and the "sexual outlaw" aspect of the gay rights movement was something deeply meaningful to me (as a philosophy, oddly, and not a personal manifesto; I have the sexual history of an uptight protestant... because I am one). I believe, still, that out loud and proud gay activism should challenge every aspect of the heteronormative pressures our society puts forth, including the notions of marriage, fidelity and monogamy that are drilled into us day after day (just ask Vito Fossella. Or Elliott Spitzer.)
Still, that was before, as I've mentioned previously, going to my first gay wedding, where I took pictures for my very good friends, and brought them a lovely Smythson guest sign-in book (again: uptight, and protestant. How many times must I tell you?). Just like a real wedding. The ceremony, on Martha's Vineyard, in a three day affair, was lovely. Just like a real wedding.
Because it was.
Ultimately, as Red points out, there's a lot of political reasons to be impressed today. But this is personal. This is what Loving vs. Virginia means to me, and to my family. This is, as Mildred Loving said, about love, and families, and the simple, human desire to spend your life with the person you love. And so... if it makes me a little less rad, I'll admit: this marriage thing is pretty cool. And necessary. And I, too, am thrilled to see California move into the modern age.
But remember... it means we can get married. It doesn't mean we have to. :) Because I do... still... want to be one with the freaks, weirdos, and outsiders.
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